I (heart) John C. McGinley

Many of you know him as Dr. Cox on Scrubs. Most in the Ds community also know him as a loving father of Max, his 11 year old son who happens to have Down syndrome and who has been the Buddy Walk spokesperson for a few years. Shortly after moving to our current state, we started receiving a magazine called EP or Exceptional Parent. We didn't sign up for it and I've wondered if it's a part of EI, but we do enjoy it. In the latest volume 38 issue 12, John is on the cover. I've seen him speak about Max and Ds before and he did a great job once again. Here's an excerpt from his interview. BTW, John, I'm game to join a new militant arm of the NDSS any day!

EP: As someone with years of experience and great success in the entertainment industry, how do you feel about the portrayal of individuals with disabilities in television and film?

JCM: Well, I have a pretty strong feeling about that, mostly as it pertains to kids with Down syndrome because kids with Down syndrome have the physical markers of persons with challenges. I mean, you see some kids with autism, and you wouldn't know until you saw either their behavior--or something. Well, kids with Down syndrome have markers and so when you see cowards like the "Ben Stillers of the world" producing films like Tropic Thunder and dropping the "R" word 17 times in 5 minutes...well, I'll tell you something, when I see Ben, that just makes me want to pick on HIM now. Because there's no militant arm of the National Down Syndrome Society (NDSS) that's going to respond to a transgression--like there is in the Jewish community with the Anti Defamation League. Or, God forbid, you go and say something against African Americans; you're going to have the NAACP in your kitchen. We don't have the militant arm at NDSS. We have kids who when THEY go to a protest, it looks funny because they ARE so nice, and you know damn well they would rather have a hug than hold a placard. So, it really cuts me to the core. And it feels like the perfect storm of cowardice when you pick on people who can't return service. So for Ben Stiller--who directed Tropic Thunder he is just a punk coward.

EP: So Ben Stiller is not a friend of yours?

JCM: He couldn't possibly be a friend of mine. Because he worked with the Farrelly brothers--doing Something About Mary--and the Farrelly brothers have championed a lot of special needs causes. So there is no way that you're not--if you're Ben Stiller--aware that you're perpetuating a negative stigma and that your doing something hurtful. And so while I don't want to be another actor who's going to tell somebody how to talk and what's politically correct and what's not, if you're aware that you're hurting either caregivers or people with Down syndrome, what's the upside?

I don't like exclusionary language. I hate it. Because all it does is perpetuate negative stigmas about different groups. And where's the upside? The upside, I assume, is when people use language like that is that someone is trying to elevate themselves by denigrating whoever the subject is. And it doesn't work that way. It just makes you a jackass. And I loathe it. I hate bullies and that to me, is like bully language. I loathe it.

Lunch with Santa on the Train

Know any kids who like trains? Yesterday we took a ride with Santa on a train and had a jolly old time. Lunch consisted of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, sugar cookies, chips and Capri Sun juice packs. Mark and I got such a kick out of the squeezy silver juice containers that you puncture with a straw. Neither of us had had one since we were kids. The 'orange flavored juice blend drink' tastes the same as it did 100 years ago.

As for Alexander's tooth, well, it may be a 'black tooth' just like his daddy had as a kid. The x-ray showed that there wasn't a fracture to the tooth, but the dentist believes he had to have bumped it. Neither Mark, myself, or preschool can remember any such 'trauma' as it's called. Likely the tooth was bumped and caused damage to the nerve which died, turning grey. The only chance that it will lighten up and heal is if it was only a bruise-like injury. These can lighten up after about 6 months as blood flow to teeth is not good. We'll keep an eye out, especially for an abscess as that would require pulling the tooth, just like his daddy. Mark's little brother had a black tooth too. However, after going on a bike ride with his cousins and knocking 5 teeth out (including the black one), they didn't have to watch it anymore. Yikes!

Personality

If you know me, you know this description is pretty spot on. Weirdly spot on even. I took Dr. Phil's Personality Test courtesy of Renee and scored in this range:

31 TO 40 POINTS:
Others see you as sensible, cautious, careful & practical. They see you as clever, gifted, or talented, but modest (well, I don't know about this part). Not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who's extremely loyal to friends you do make and who expect the same loyalty in return. Those who really get to know you, realize it takes a lot to shake your trust in your friends, but equally that it takes you a long time to get over if that trust is ever broken.

It's the friendship part that hit a chord with me. Wanna know your score? Click here to visit Renee's blog and take the test (its only 10 questions) and be sure to let me know your score and if you think mine is correct.

Family Fun at the North Pole

We stopped at a greezy diner last night for breakfast at dinner and I drove. After dinner while putting the kids in their car seats, Alexander informed Mark of the following:

(Alexander) "You should drive Daddy. Mommy isn't a very good driver."
(Mark) "Mommy is an excellent driver."
(Alexander) Mommy is good at the computer."

There is something wrong with that on so many levels.

Also, yesterday Alexander's top right front tooth began to turn grey from the inside (as in not a stain on the outside). The grey is the top half of the tooth. He has not had any mouth injuries that we know of, including at preschool. It's even darker grey this morning and we're going to the dentist today.

Mark and his little brother had a 'black tooth' as kids, but both were from injuries where the tooth got chipped. Mark's ended up getting an abscess and pulled leaving him without a front tooth for years. Since I too had a front tooth accident (losing both in a tree swing accident a year earlier than they would have fallen out), and remember it well, I'm freaking out a little bit. I know it's just a tooth, but he's only 3. Man!

Then, last night our local hospital sponsored an event filled with live reindeer, Santa and Mrs. Claus, teddy bear check ups by the doctors, and crafts (making reindeer hats). This time Alexander wrote his wish list and delivered it to Santa himself without running away. Sophie had a good time too.

Christmas Lights

Whew, we just finished decorating our house with Christmas lights. It took a whole weekend to do. Merry Christmas!

If you believe that, I've got some ocean front property in Arizona to sell you.

Inclusive Schools Week

Inclusive Schools Week (Dec. 1-5) is an annual event sponsored by the Inclusive Schools Network (ISN) at Education Development Center, Inc. (EDC), which is held each year during the first week in December. Since its inception in 2001, Inclusive Schools Week has celebrated the progress that schools have made in providing a supportive and quality education to an increasingly diverse student population, including students who are marginalized due to disability, gender, socio-economic status, cultural heritage, language preference and other factors.

Last year, our local Down Syndrome Network participated in National Inclusive Schools Week by donating books about Down syndrome to local schools. Since Alexander is in preschool this year, we were able to participate. Yesterday he donated "Hi I'm Ben...and I've Got a Secret" to his preschool's library.

As a bonus, here are a few shots from Sophie's playgroup yesterday.

This mat was not only colorful, but had many different textures as well.

Girls will be girls...

Maybe

Maybe we're having another girl in May. Maybe it's a boy. Care to guess? Take the poll on the right through noon next Wednesday, December 10th. We have a Level II ultrasound in the next week and a half and just Maybe we'll have an answer. The outcome is a big one. As of now our home is equally balanced. We have 2 cats, 1 boy, 1 girl. We have 2 kids, 1 boy, 1 girl and of course 1 Mom & 1 Dad. I think I know, but I'm not telling until we know for sure.

The following old wives tales are true for me and call for a boy:
You are craving salty or sour foods
You are craving protein -- meats and cheese (what am I NOT craving?)
Your feet are colder than they were before pregnancy (it is cold out)
Your hands are very dry (I do wash them 50 million times a day)
You are having headaches (got one now)
You add your age at the time of conception and the number for the month you conceived and the sum is an even number

Yet these are true too, and they call for a girl:
Your baby's heart rate is at least 140 beats per minute
You are craving sweets (ridiculously)
You crave orange juice (every morning)
You don't look quite as good as normal during pregnancy (dang)
You are moodier than usual during pregnancy (Mark, no comments please)
Your face breaks out more than usual (yuck)
You refuse to eat the heel of a loaf of bread (always have)
Your pillow faces south when you sleep
The Chinese gender chart calls for a girl (it was right for Alexander, wrong for Sophie)